|
Post by Rastul on Jul 15, 2008 23:35:16 GMT -5
So, out of curiosity, how much does being able to converse freely with someone factor into your idea of a relationship?
[Of course, sharing silences is the final step, I think, but let's assume that that always comes after a successful pairing is made and prolonged, yada yada yada.]
|
|
|
Post by Luka on Jul 19, 2008 20:18:13 GMT -5
You mean, "What is it like to hold a girl in your arms?" kekekeke
Well pretty much being able to converse freely must mean you at least have something in common or that at least you enjoy talking to each other...I think it's pretty important at least. But then again I'm kind of old fashioned so I'm not thrown off by long periods of silence. Sometimes I'd rather just sit back and listen to nature or something, enjoy the other person's company by them just being there.
I don't know what you really mean by 'converse freely' though. You mean like being able to talk to each other easily by just talking or actually being able to talk to each other whenever you want as in like other things getting in the way?
But I think it's important enough but not the most important part of a relationship. Just being able to sit and talk is great but I think it sort of depends on what kind of people are together. Some are quieter than others and whatnot.
...*CONFUSES SELF, NEVER SPEAKS AGAIN*
|
|
|
Post by Zephyr on Jul 22, 2008 19:41:19 GMT -5
You've got it twisted, Luka. He means ' So, there's this girl, and I can speak with her comfortably...does that mean I've got a chance?' Fwahaha, just kidding...
But yeah, being able to talk to someone about personal matters and stuff like that's improtant: It brings an element of trust into the relationship, and if you can't trust someone, there's nothing there. There has to be a balance: Being able to share conversation is important, but so is understanding that everybody has their secrets. If you attempt to probe too deeply into another's life, or don't trust them enough to talk to them about issues, there's nothing there.
I might be completely off-topic and may have misunderstood the topic. If that's the case, you have every right to pin me on a wall and fire at me with a nailgun ^^
|
|
|
Post by Rastul on Jul 22, 2008 23:28:31 GMT -5
Close, but no cigar, Zephyr. I'm much more older and twisted than you are, heh. Previous experience [also 'close, but no cigar' type thing] got me wondering.
I'm pretty bad with conversation, well, maybe I feel that way because most of the time I'm trying to come up with things to talk about when I don't have much interest in discussing it at all .. but I do it anyways.
What I hate about 'hanging out' with people is that you sit down, tap your fingers, and whenever you say something they either laugh, say "yeah man", or something like that, and blah. A conversation is two-sided, right? It should be a spontaneous thing, a train of thought which stems from something initiated from one side and has the potential to go in a totally different direction and sustain itself for hours.
Yeah, that's the kind of 'conversation' I was thinking about.
Of course, sadly, no matter how well your conversations mesh (or even personality), you also have to 'like what you see.' Relationships are pretty physical too, since there's the whole force of human evolution in your biology pushing for that procreation, naw what I mean?
|
|
|
Post by Zephyr on Jul 23, 2008 6:32:52 GMT -5
An important factor in conversation is interest, my friend. If you and this other person share an interest in something (A sport, a tv show, etc) then you'll find that that certain subject sparks off the conversations that will spiral off anywhere. That's what I find when I'm out with people, anyway.
Yeah, physical appearance is just as important too. The ability to freely converse and share silences with each other combined with a few shared interests, being physically attracted to one-another and 'pushing for procreation' as you would call it all contribute into a greater power.
And that greater power is love! ^^
|
|
|
Post by Rastul on Jul 23, 2008 7:30:46 GMT -5
Your soul is pure and yet uncorrupted by the mistress of life. I'll let someone else be responsible for tying some weights to your floaty feet ; D.
But yeah, good points.
|
|
|
Post by Luka on Jul 30, 2008 3:28:31 GMT -5
*gets Zephyr's cement shoes ready* >=D
It's probably the type of friends you have, Rastul, if you're having conversations like that. Sometimes it really can't be helped though! I've got friends where I have to work to talk and others where they'll drop by and we'll talk for hours and realize at the end when we're parting ways that we've talked about absolutely NOTHING. Those kinds are the most satisfying and the visits that I look forward to, personally. Also with personal circumstances as they lie, I haven't really thought about any sort of romantic-type thing for a while, cept that one time.
A lot of times too if you're out with someone for that 'particular' reason, a person puts on a more subtle version of themself. That toned down smile and laugh and putting conscious effort into manners. Which is great and all, but why tone yourself down to someone you want to be with? It could end up good, sure, but then you're putting all your effort into appearances and other distracting things instead of just making sure you're having an honest good time. Usually that's what I try to stay away from, since I can usually tell when someone's got something else on their mind. 'Course I probably wouldn't talk to anyone the way I talk to Rastul already...kekekeke!
|
|
|
Post by Adrian on Jul 31, 2008 9:47:25 GMT -5
To whom it may concern,
All this deep conversation. . . wow.
The most I can say about myself in the situations you're all speaking about is that being around me varies a lot. Sometimes I should probably come with a disclaimer. But all that is beside the point.
The point is that anything I say will probably not sound very intelligent or come off as incredbly biased. I'm that guy at the party people are surprised to see even showed up if they even know who I am at all. My behaviour often changes depending on what I need to get done. Go figure, I'm getting into acting. Until I get around someone I'm really comfortable with, then I unleash the me that often scares my own family.
So much that I even have a t-shirt to prove it.
Love can see past a lot of things you might consider as flaws about yourself if it's real enough to both people. As long as it isn't something like going to work with a spandex costume everday while you crunch numbers. [Tick reference FTW.] The point I'm skating around trying to make is that whether you have a crush on a longtime friend or you just want an involved conversation really depends on the people you hang around.
If you're unhappy with it you can always do it the old-fashioned way, trying to find new people. Which I suggest you do while wearing a Tuxedo, a top-hat, and a white masquerade ball mask. Always attracts the real interesting people in my opinion. Or you can try it the new emotional hoo-hah way by discussing all of this with your current gang of miscreants. Which always has fun results whether good or bad.
Sincerely, Completely Unhelpful
|
|
|
Post by Rastul on Jul 31, 2008 22:51:47 GMT -5
You know what, fuck it; everyone should just wait for the spark.
Seriously, it just saves so much time.
|
|